“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.”– Gandalf, from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
Most years, around the end of the year, I write a post about what I’m taking into the new year and what I’m leaving behind. This is my idea of setting intentions and thinking of goals that fit my life.
If you want to see last year’s thoughts, you can find them here.
I like rereading them and seeing what the brought me, where I missed the mark and where I grew.
At quick glance, I brought poetry back to my life.
I wrote a few dozen poems this year – some were joyful, some were angry, short and long – they all had meaning. I actually started using threads for the majority of my poetry writing. It also gives me the challenge to stay within a character limit.
I also know that my relationship ended very quickly after I shared last year’s post, and that was meant to happen. I did bring patience to myself – I also brought acceptance, discovery and curiosity.
I opened myself up to a lot of experiences this year.
I traveled a SHIT TON this year by plane and a lot of local weekend and day trips within 7 hours by car.
I went on a dozen hikes, saw 6 national parks and had a lot of naps on the trail and campouts in the car. I crushed school this year. I can’t believe I only have 3 terms left.
I had sterilization surgery, I met new friends – leaned into volunteer work and embraced my queerness in what felt like coming out again.
I left most of doubt behind in 2022, but she crept in periodically.
I saw her when I decided to leave my role as an executive director and go back to working for myself. I felt like I failed even though mentors and friends told me that was far from true. She crept in when I started searching for my nutrition practicum site, but quickly faded when I found a location in three days after I started the search.
Surprisingly, I was consistent with weightlifting and overall activity. I took 44 dance classes this year, almost one every week. I did 100 Street Parking workouts this year, with the most in May before I had to take a break due to repeated hip issues – something I didn’t share because I was so angry about it. While it didn’t look like how I thought it would, I still got 1-2 workouts out. They may not have been intense, but it was something.
When I think about the upcoming year with school and coaching, I know that I will have to pivot a few times. Schedules will change, there will be late nights, a good chunk of early morning workouts.
I’m bringing flexibility into the new year. I’m bringing small joy because it’s tiny moments that add up that are meaningful for me lately.
I’m bringing in my voice, which seems so odd to write, but this year I was more comfortable being vocal about my identities and not being pushed around in my beliefs around patient and client care.
There are a lot of people in healthcare and public health that don’t understand that you can’t treat every patient or client the same. There is nuance that is tied to lived experiences, culture, systemic racism, etc. Using my voice this year helped me take chances and also say, no thanks, our values don’t align.
I’m excited about the new year. I’m excited to see what growth I make and where I decide to just let myself breathe.
